Facebook buys Iceland

Tech giant relocates to cooler climate

Facing increased pressure from government to toe the line and actively police their users’ posts, Facebook has decided to lower the temperature both politically and physically by moving its entire operation to Iceland.

The frozen nation was reeling from the economic effects of pandemic lockdowns, travel bans and social support. So much so, that a white knight is just what Iceland needed. In fact, there were rumours that the Icelandic government approached Apple for a bail-out, but Tim Cook wasn’t interested.

Now Facebook has ‘employed’ all 341,000 citizens of the country, essentially relieving the government from the necessity to provide UBI or social security. It’s not a company town – it’s a company country. With yearly income far exceeding Iceland’s GDP, Facebook could afford it.

“It’s a win-win for us,” said Mark Zuckerberg, “We get to house our server farms in a cool place, with minimum need for refrigeration, and with all that geothermal energy available, we’re clean, green and always running at full steam!” Other advantages are zero taxes on global profits and minimal political or government oversight. No more Senate hearings!

It also turns out that a sovereign nation in the far North Atlantic, strategically positioned between Europe and America, is a great place to launch a global digital currency and international payments mechanism, with no need for approval from the Fed – or anyone else.

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