It’s tough being 122. If you thought puberty or being a twenty-something was challenging, just wait until you get to 120-something!

You’ve got the body of a 90-year-old; so what? It’s still an effort to get out of bed, and those neuroprosthetic implants keep your mind sharp, but the constant software updates are literally giving you headaches.

Slowing and reversing physical aging has become more than a science – now it’s an industry, and once you’re on that bandwagon, you’re hooked for (the rest of your) life. It’s been a breakthrough in medical science, treating aging as a disease at the cellular level.

But let’s face facts: You can’t just get involved when you feel like it. If you want to have the benefits of a younger body and a youthful mind, you’ve got to be committed. To an endless regime of personalized supplements and strict optimum nutrition – and that’s just for starters. The ‘age vaccine’ is also a bundle of genetically modified viruses, to cut and paste your DNA, and that has to be ‘updated’ every couple of years.

The big problem comes in with lifestyle changes; we bold oldies are so busy with life, we’ve got no time to enjoy living. Everything that’s really great about life is bad for us, and staying alive is just so much work, it’s tedious. And then there’s the cost of life. No wonder some people want to check out early.

It’s really tough when you’re too old to rock ‘n roll, but far too young to die!