Now you can update your Facebook status and search Google just by thinking about it. And you don’t need fancy headgear or wires sticking out of your skull.

Just a simple implant; much like a hearing aid, the EarWig acts like a computer mouse and mike, letting you select words to match your thinking. The nano-technology sensors detect your brain patterns by ‘listening’ to your thoughts and translating them into recognizable commands and phrases on your microlens display.

And the BlueMax wireless link sends your thoughts streaming away into the web. With a little practice you are able to Tweet, update and search – it’s like thinking aloud to a computer that listens. And connected to your friends’ thoughts and blogs, it’s just like ESP. Suddenly you’ve got a real ‘sixth sense’.

New business opportunities, like trading forex futures while lunching with a client, are sure to make the EarWig as popular in the boardroom as it is on the street.

Surveillance also just got a big upgrade. Why bother with a spy cam and microphone when you can record exactly what you are seeing, hearing – and thinking?

Just remember to think “MUTE” when an attractive person walks past – after all, you don’t want to share all your thoughts with the whole world. Or do you?