AI killed the Christmas romcom
Viewers rebel against an endless stream of movies with the same faces
Imagine channel surfing, looking for a feelgood movie while the snow is falling outside, the Christmas tree is lit up, the house smells of cinnamon and food, and the rest of the family is due in a couple of hours. Then imagine that all the Christmas romcoms you can choose from have different actors. This was the reality in the ‘20s after the Screen Actors Guild won the fight against the movie producers and their diabolic “AI scan reuse policy.” A policy, if agreed to, that would have allowed the studios to reuse actors’ images and voices. Forever!
Back then, actors rebelled against the obvious work and salary impacts, but no one really could imagine what a Christmas holiday would be like if every movie had the same two leading actors. Until now! After last year’s renegotiation, where the movie studios lured actors with multi-million-dollar contracts and won the AI war, the studios went into hyperdrive. Led by Netflix, Amazon Prime, Disney, YouTube, and Apple, the producers ‘cast’ their prime couples in every possible genre and formulaic story, all written and produced by AIs.
After more than a year of new and re-cast re-makes of the great movie classics, all featuring the same ‘captive couple’, the initial delight started to wane, and finally vanished completely when all the latest Christmas romcoms featured the same favorite actors. The boredom factor beats unlimited choice, and early indications show that over Christmas, box office revenue has fallen by as much as 80%.
The streaming services seem to be equally hard hit. Yesterday, Flick-a-Net’s CEO Tom Moore said in an SEC earnings warning that “December ’33 is a bloodbath, we have lost about 77% of our subscribers over the holidays.”
Meanwhile, in Hollywood, Beverly Hills and Santa Monica, the few surviving casting agencies are scrambling madly to meet the sudden demand for real live actors. It looks like the spring and summer seasons will be packed with new faces and voices on the silver screens!
Warning: Hazardous thinking at work
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